I've found myself a little bit perturbed with God lately. I pray and I pray and it seems I don't get answers. My Dad died a year and half ago, my mom is now sick with cancer. I asked God, "Why?" I've asked God to cure her to cure my Dad and I didn't get the answers that I wanted.
Today, I was singing as I often do when I'm by myself. I don't want to subject anyone else to my noise, but I love to sing. Anyway, I was singing bits and pieces of several songs. I like to do that too. I jump from song to song singing my favorite bits! I stumbled upon one that used to be my favorite, You'll Never Walk Alone. No, I'm not that old, but I did take voice lessons once upon a time and that was in my repertoire!
As I was mindlessly singing away. I stopped suddenly as I realized the words I was saying and it hit me. I was expecting the wrong thing from God. He never promised to fix things or answer all my prayers just the way I wanted. He doesn't promise to heal every illness or stop every heart ache, He only promises to be there with us to help us through them.
I know this, but I forgot it somewhere through all the terrible heart ache of watching my Dad die and now facing my mother going through cancer too. I looked back through my memories of my Dad's illness and I realized that God did answer my prayers. My Dad did not suffer as so many do with the type of cancer he had. He suffered more than I wanted him too, but so many little nuggets of blessings were present through that trying time.
My mother has already had many blessing and answers to my prayers. Her cancer was contained. She received good news for the illness she has. We are very blessed. I continue to pray that she will not suffer and that her continued treatment goes as well as the doctor predicts. And above all, I thank God for His blessings, His answers to my prayers and for helping me to see that He is there with me and my family. I have to trust, to believe and to be conscious of His presence and stop being so determined to have things my way.
"Walk on through the wind, walk on through the rain and you'll never walk alone."
Today, I was singing as I often do when I'm by myself. I don't want to subject anyone else to my noise, but I love to sing. Anyway, I was singing bits and pieces of several songs. I like to do that too. I jump from song to song singing my favorite bits! I stumbled upon one that used to be my favorite, You'll Never Walk Alone. No, I'm not that old, but I did take voice lessons once upon a time and that was in my repertoire!
As I was mindlessly singing away. I stopped suddenly as I realized the words I was saying and it hit me. I was expecting the wrong thing from God. He never promised to fix things or answer all my prayers just the way I wanted. He doesn't promise to heal every illness or stop every heart ache, He only promises to be there with us to help us through them.
I know this, but I forgot it somewhere through all the terrible heart ache of watching my Dad die and now facing my mother going through cancer too. I looked back through my memories of my Dad's illness and I realized that God did answer my prayers. My Dad did not suffer as so many do with the type of cancer he had. He suffered more than I wanted him too, but so many little nuggets of blessings were present through that trying time.
My mother has already had many blessing and answers to my prayers. Her cancer was contained. She received good news for the illness she has. We are very blessed. I continue to pray that she will not suffer and that her continued treatment goes as well as the doctor predicts. And above all, I thank God for His blessings, His answers to my prayers and for helping me to see that He is there with me and my family. I have to trust, to believe and to be conscious of His presence and stop being so determined to have things my way.
"Walk on through the wind, walk on through the rain and you'll never walk alone."
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